On Love, Take Two

I once thought I understood love; now I realize I didn’t and I still don’t. Recently, though, I’ve been reading many words of wisdom type lists — mostly on writing — and I came across this gem by Susan Sontag. I’m now thoroughly convinced that it’s essential for a writer to keep a diary, but unfortunately I have never been able to sustain this discipline. In any case, Susan’s notes on love inspired me to pen a few of my own and this is what I’ve come up with:

  1. Only time will tell if he’s the right guy or not.
  2. Sometimes there’s no Mr. Right, only Mr. Right Now.
  3. While it’s difficult to judge a relationship from the inside, it’s just as hard to judge from the outside.
  4. The best kind of love sets you free to be yourself.
  5. A healthy relationship can be measured by how much freedom you give to one another.
  6. Someone always wears the pants — decide for yourself if you would rather wear them or have your partner wear them.
  7. If you never fight, that means either you don’t care enough or you don’t know each other well enough.
  8. When you think about the person you love, the first feeling you get should be happiness. Trust your gut — if your first instinct is hesitation, fear, or anxiety, there’s something wrong.
  9. It’s not okay to play games, but it is okay to wait before showing your hand.
  10. You don’t have to break up with someone the first time the thought crosses your mind. But if the thought returns regularly, the relationship has an expiration date.
  11. The moment your partner’s happiness becomes more important to you than yours is when your relationship moves from puppy love to the real deal.
  12. Just as it’s possible to love someone without being in love with him, it’s also possible to love someone without liking him.
  13. The more you like and respect your partner, the easier the relationship will be.
  14. Never, ever judge your partner by placing yourself in their shoes and thinking of how much better you would have done. Everyone loves in different ways.
  15. Sometimes it can be hard to feel loved. In this instance, try to think loved. For example, even though you don’t feel he cares about you because he never says it, you know rationally that he does because of his actions.
  16. There is no such thing as a mutual breakup.
  17. Cheating is a grave offense, but it doesn’t automatically mean the end of a relationship.
  18. Sometimes, the perfect couple is the one that stays together.
  19. Age may be just a number, but stage of life is not.
  20. It is always better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all.
  21. Love yourself first before trying to love someone else.

That’s all I have for today. Which ones ring true for you? What other advice would you add?

Au revoir,

R

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3 thoughts on “On Love, Take Two

  1. The question for me should be, ” Which one does NOT ring true for me? ”

    # 17, about cheating. Cheating to me will end a relationship, no questions asked, unforgivable, apologies not accepted, DIE .

    • Really? Sorry if this question is too personal, but have you ever been in such a situation? I only ask because I FEEL like I could get past cheating in a relationship, but I don’t know for sure because it’s never happened to me.

      • No, thank goodness ! Cheating to me is BETRAYAL, betrayal of trust. And I do believe that a cheater is a cheater is a cheater. I can never look at the guy the same way again. It will be soooo tiring to be with him. I would rather that he breaks up with me first if he gets attracted to another girl.

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